Paradise lost in a Hawaiian vacation rental

Nights in white wicker

The house was perfectly fine: conveniently located near excellent snorkeling, updated kitchen, washer and dryer, parking spots, two huge televisions with basic cable, toilet paper provided.

Aesthetically, it was like a flea market in overdrive, specializing in the arts and crafts hawked at tropical cruise ship ports. It overflowed my mental junk drawer and made it hard to fall asleep, knowing what lurked in the dark. These are a few of my favorites:

Parrot watches every movement.
Pineapple makes paper towels feel pretty.
Dragon guards VCR under fake plant.
Pretty lady mends net for pretty fisherman. And lace curtain.
Bathroom light switches with Polynesia.
Painting by Woody, parrot by Satan.
Block-headed woman ignores mauve-matted jungle.
Flip flop night light.
Edginess in white wicker bookshelf.

(If you are the owner of this vacation rental, I’m also leaving you a positive review on the rental site. Thanks.)

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